The paradoxical understanding that boundaries between self and loss can blur, and that on triggering dates, allowing the distinction to soften can lead to unexpected peace.
Mirabai famously crossed boundaries—she left her family, disguised herself as male, danced in temples, sang in the streets. She dissolved the separation between herself and her beloved Krishna, between self and Divine. This radical dissolution frightened her society but freed her completely. This framework suggests that on grief anniversaries, you might experiment with dissolving boundaries too: between you and the person you've lost, between your pain and their presence, between 'moving on' and 'continuing together in new form.' Some traditions believe the dead are closest on their anniversaries; some find that grief melts boundaries between living and remembering. Rather than insisting on clear separation and 'acceptance' of loss, you might ask: What if the boundary is less fixed than I thought? What if my loved one lives in me? This dissolution, while disorienting, can bring unexpected peace and connection on triggering dates.
Peri can explain this concept, give practical examples, help you decide whether it applies to your situation, or recommend a journey if appropriate.
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