The principle that healthy attachment enables both partners' freedom and authentic expression, not restriction or possession.
Mirabai's love for Krishna was radically liberating—it freed her from patriarchal marriage, social expectation, and false self. This is the opposite of possessive love. In bhakti tradition, true devotion expands the beloved's freedom; it doesn't cage them. Many attachment patterns involve subtle or overt control: needing your partner to be available constantly, checking their phone, isolating them from others, or demanding constant reassurance. Mirabai would ask: does this love serve their freedom or your fear? A secure attachment honors both partners' autonomy, growth, and individual spiritual paths. When choosing a partner or examining your attachment style, measure love by freedom: Does this person make me more myself or less? Can I trust them because they're trustworthy, not because I've controlled them? Does our bond expand both our capacities, or does it shrink us? Freedom is not indifference; it's devotion that wants the beloved to flourish completely.
Peri can explain this concept, give practical examples, help you decide whether it applies to your situation, or recommend a journey if appropriate.
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