The practice of releasing resentment toward who you were by understanding that person was doing the best they could with their understanding at the time.
Kshama, the Sanskrit concept of forgiveness and patience, offers a path through the shame and self-recrimination that often accompanies identity loss. You may grieve not just who you were but feel angry at that person for their choices, blindness, or compromises. Mirabai's path involved forgiving the constraints placed upon her while also forgiving herself for accepting them. This concept teaches that your former identity wasn't a failure—it was a necessary chapter. The person you were couldn't have been different without different knowledge, different courage, different circumstances. They were doing the best possible with their level of awareness. Kshama toward yourself means releasing the fantasy that you should have known better, chosen differently, rebelled sooner. This doesn't excuse harm caused, but it contextualizes it. By extending compassion to your former self—the person grieving who you were—you free yourself from the added suffering of self-blame and can mourn authentically.
Peri can explain this concept, give practical examples, help you decide whether it applies to your situation, or recommend a journey if appropriate.
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