Love as Practice, Not Proof

Bhakti devotion in Mirabai's tradition functions as a daily practice—a way of being, a discipline, a commitment to showing up with the heart open regardless of what feelings arise. This differs from the modern romantic notion of love as an overwhelming feeling that proves compatibility. Many attachment-anxious people constantly monitor their feelings, seeking reassurance that they love and are loved, creating exhausting emotional volatility. By reframing love as practice, Mirabai's model suggests we commit to particular actions and attitudes: showing up, listening, honoring the beloved, maintaining integrity, practicing forgiveness. The feelings may fluctuate, but the practice remains steady. In examining attachment style in partner selection, this framework asks: Am I choosing this person based on exciting feelings or on a realistic assessment of whether we can practice commitment together? Do I expect love to feel a certain way, or can I recognize love as disciplined choice? Can I maintain my practice even when feelings cool? This perspective supports the shift from anxious attachment—which constantly seeks emotional validation—toward secure attachment, which rests on the reliable practice of showing up with intention and integrity.