Identifying the root psychological obstacles—ignorance, ego, desire, aversion, and fear of loss—that perpetuate insecure attachment patterns.
Patanjali identifies five kleshas, or afflictions, as the sources of all suffering: avidya (ignorance), asmita (ego/I-ness), raga (attachment/desire), dvesha (aversion/rejection), and abhinivesha (fear of death/loss). These directly illuminate attachment dysfunction. Avidya manifests as not understanding your own needs or your partner's psychology. Asmita inflates self-importance, making rejection feel catastrophic. Raga is the desperate grasping for security through the partner. Dvesha pushes away vulnerability or differences. Abhinivesha is the terror of abandonment or loss. All five kleshas weave together in insecure attachment. Patanjali's framework provides precise psychological language for recognizing these patterns. By naming them explicitly, partners can observe their functioning without shame. The yoga tradition teaches that awareness precedes transformation; seeing how ignorance, ego, and fear drive your attachment behavior is the first step toward freedom. Understanding kleshas transforms blame into compassion—toward yourself and your partner.
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