The Illusion of Merit in Selection

Favoritism often hides behind claims of merit: 'We chose the best.' But Rabia's spiritual wisdom reveals the ego's capacity for self-deception. What we call merit is often simply familiarity, resemblance to ourselves, or advantage disguised as ability. This concept examines how organizations, families, and communities rationalize favoritism through false attribution—crediting the favored with virtues they may not possess while overlooking competence in the overlooked. Rabia knew that the ego is a master of justification, capable of believing its own narratives. She taught that true seeing requires stripping away these stories. Applied to favoritism, this means questioning our selection narratives: Who told us these people are superior? What advantages did they inherit? What would we see if we looked as honestly at those we've dismissed? The illusion of merit operates at both individual and systemic levels, with devastating consequences for legacy and community. By exposing the stories we tell ourselves about why we prefer whom we prefer, we create space for more authentic community-building based on actual contribution rather than convenient narrative.