Intoxication Through Presence

Rabia's love of God was described as intoxication—a state of being so absorbed in relationship that the self dissolves into the Other. Foster parents can cultivate this quality in moments with their children: full, undivided presence during a conversation, play, or quiet evening. When a foster parent is truly present—not distracted by phone or worry, not thinking about what comes next, but fully engaged with the child in this moment—something sacred occurs. The child feels the weight of genuine attention, rarer than any material gift. This intoxication through presence counteracts the fragmentation many foster children have experienced: being unseen, unheard, passed between systems. Moments of profound presence become anchors, instances where the child's nervous system downregulates, where they know they matter. Over time, accumulated moments of true presence rewire the child's understanding of relationship and belonging. The foster parent does not need to be perfect or constantly available; rather, the quality of presence in genuine moments becomes the healing medicine.