Understanding your teen's yearnings and separateness not as rejection, but as essential spiritual and psychological growth toward becoming themselves.
Rabia spoke of longing (shawq) as the soul's deepest pull toward the divine. In adolescence, your teen's yearning for independence, peers, and autonomy mirrors this sacred longing. Parents often interpret this separation as betrayal or loss, triggering attempts to reclaim closeness through guilt or control. But Rabia's framework reframes the teen's emotional distance as their soul seeking its own relationship with meaning and identity. By honoring their longing rather than resisting it, parents create space for genuine belonging—not fusion, but deep mutual respect. This shift acknowledges that your teen must long for something beyond you in order to mature. Their "leaving" is not abandonment; it is their own Sufi journey, and your role is to witness it with love rather than fear.
Peri can explain this concept, give practical examples, help you decide whether it applies to your situation, or recommend a journey if appropriate.
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