Love Without Expectation of Return

Rabia famously taught loving God without hope of reward or fear of punishment—pure devotion untainted by transaction. Applied to birth and early bonding, this framework releases the caregiver from the hidden contracts we often unknowingly make: 'I will love you if you sleep well, develop normally, make me proud.' True bonding, in this tradition, means offering presence and care with no conditions, no internal scorekeeping, no expectations of gratitude. The infant cannot reciprocate; cannot yet know the sacrifice made. This teaches parents a radical acceptance: the giving itself is the reward, the presence itself is the purpose. This approach paradoxically creates the most secure attachment, because the child develops in an environment free from conditional love, free from the need to perform for care.