A reflective practice of identifying whom we favor and what their preferred qualities reveal about our wounded, unmet needs and unexamined values.
Our favorites are mirrors. When we consistently favor certain people, we're often drawn to qualities we've rejected in ourselves or desperately need to reclaim. A parent who favors an obedient child may be suppressing their own resistance; a friend who favors the successful may be disowning their own ordinariness. Rabia's path of pure devotion requires rigorous self-examination. This mirror work involves: listing those we favor and those we overlook, naming the qualities that draw our preference, asking what these preferences protect or compensate for within us. Through this lens, favoritism becomes diagnostic—it shows us where we're still broken, still seeking external validation, still trapped in conditional love. The practice isn't about shame but awakening. By understanding favoritism's roots in our own fragmentation, we develop compassion for our patterns and the capacity to choose differently. This mirrors Rabia's own fierce inner work, her struggle to love God without need, without preference, without condition.
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