The Practice of Witnessing

In Rabia's spiritual practice, witnessing the Divine required complete attention and presence. Translated to adult relationships with adult children, witnessing is the practice of truly seeing your child—their struggles, joys, values, and choices—without immediately moving to advice, correction, or interpretation through your own lens. It means listening to understand rather than listening to respond. This practice acknowledges that your adult child is living their own spiritual and existential journey, one you cannot fully walk for them. Witnessing involves asking genuine questions, reflecting back what you hear, and offering support when asked. It recognizes that sometimes presence itself is the greatest gift; not every problem requires your solution. For parents, this practice cultivates humility and acceptance of limits. For adult children, it creates safety to be fully human—flawed, questioning, becoming—without performing for parental approval. Witnessing becomes the container within which mature relationships can deepen.