Embracing Rabia's surrender to divine mystery as a parental practice—releasing the need to have all answers and modeling comfort with uncertainty for adolescents.
Rabia spoke of surrendering to the will of God, accepting mystery beyond human understanding. Parents often approach adolescence with false certainty: 'I know what's best, I know who you should be.' This certainty, though protective in intent, prevents teens from finding their own answers. Rabia's model invites parents to admit: I don't know how this will unfold, I don't know who you're becoming, I trust the unfolding. This is not parental abdication but a deeper wisdom. Adolescents are naturally questioning certainties, and when parents cling to dogma (whether religious, social, or personal), conflict intensifies. When parents practice humble uncertainty—'I have values and experience, but your life is yours to discover'—they give permission for authentic adolescent development. Modeling comfort with not-knowing teaches the teen that mystery is safe, that becoming is a process, that certainty is often illusion. This surrender is radical parental trust.
Peri can explain this concept, give practical examples, help you decide whether it applies to your situation, or recommend a journey if appropriate.
Explore related journeys or tell Peri what you're working through.