Rabia's pure devotion model applied to adoptive parenting: loving the child for their own sake, not for gratitude, performance, or redemption of the parent's hopes.
Rabia al-Adawiyya taught that true love transcends transaction—loving God not for reward or fear of punishment, but purely for love itself. In adoptive parenting, this framework liberates both parent and child from unconscious contracts. Many adoptive parents carry hidden expectations: gratitude for rescue, behavioral perfection as proof of successful placement, or emotional return on investment. Rabia's model invites parents to examine and release these conditions. The child is loved not because they fulfill a dream of parenthood, complete a family narrative, or validate the parent's sacrifice, but because they exist. This creates psychological safety for the adopted child to develop authentic identity rather than performing a role. The parent's spiritual work becomes releasing attachment to outcomes, allowing genuine belonging to emerge organically rather than being demanded or constructed.
Peri can explain this concept, give practical examples, help you decide whether it applies to your situation, or recommend a journey if appropriate.
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