The psychological cost of splitting one's consciousness between favored and disfavored people, diminishing capacity for authentic presence.
When we practice favoritism, we develop a dual consciousness: one mode of engagement for the favored, another for the overlooked. This split requires constant mental effort—monitoring who deserves our warmth, calculating who warrants our time. Rabia's devotional practice cultivated unified consciousness, a single channel of authentic presence whether before a king or a beggar. Favoritism wastes the energy of love by requiring us to perform different selves for different people. This performance fragments belonging because no one experiences the complete truth of who we are. Communities built on favoritism exhaust their members with the labor of strategic relationship-building. The cost accumulates: authentic connection becomes impossible, legacy becomes tainted by the memory of whose needs were dismissed, and the favored eventually discover they were loved conditionally. A unified consciousness allows genuine presence with all people equally.
Peri can explain this concept, give practical examples, help you decide whether it applies to your situation, or recommend a journey if appropriate.
Explore related journeys or tell Peri what you're working through.