My girlfriend and I are both femme and we keep running into this thing where people assume we're just friends, and she gets really upset about it but I actually sometimes feel safer when we're not read as a couple, and now we're fighting about whether to be more affectionate in public. Neither of us is wrong but we can't seem to find a way through it.
More people experience this than they realize.
Two people are struggling with how invisibility in public spaces feels both protective and erasing depending on their individual experiences.
“Where Are You with The examined queer identity?”
If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.