Periagoge
Scenario

When forgiveness becomes ongoing punishment

I cheated on my partner three years ago and they forgave me but they bring it up in every argument and I don't know if that's fair or if I lost the right to complain.

More people experience this than they realize.

What we've seen

The difference between accountability and perpetual penance highlights how unprocessed forgiveness can become its own form of relational violence.

Your guide for this
Juana
Juana works with people navigating exactly this kind of situation.
Ideas that help explain it
Worth thinking about

“Where Are You with Punitive vs. restorative approaches to harm?”

Peri

Peri can explain why this happens, help you decide if this is the right situation for you, and point toward the right journey or coach.

If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.