My brother and I are both struggling in our marriages and when we try to support each other, we realize we're both unconsciously defending different parents from the same terrible relationship. He protects Dad's memory and I protect Mom's, and it makes it impossible to actually help each other see clearly.
More people experience this than they realize.
Loyalty to different aspects of a flawed inheritance is preventing mutual support and clarity.
“Where Are You with Your Parents' Relationship and How It Shaped Yours?”
If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.