How do I carry the patients I couldn't save?

You can walk into the worst moment in a room and steady everyone in it. That calm is earned, and it has saved lives. But calm on the outside does not mean the losses leave you. You carry every one you could not save, and that weight is real. Here is something to hold onto: you did not fail those people. You met death, which comes for everyone, and you fought it. Sometimes it wins no matter what hands are on the patient. Carrying them is not a sign you did something wrong. It is a sign you understood what was at stake. The ones you lost deserve to be remembered, but not to crush the one who remembers them. Find a way to set them down without forgetting: a name spoken, a moment at the end of a shift, a conversation with someone who understands. You honor them by staying whole enough to save the next one.