Standing between leadership and employees has left me lonely, whose side am I on?

You became the person leadership trusts and employees confide in, and standing in that middle for years has left you lonely and unsure whose side you are really on. That loneliness makes sense. The middle is a place where everyone brings you their trust but no one quite includes you. You hold both sides and belong fully to neither. The truth you may be missing is that your side is not leadership's or the employees'. It is the honest, fair thing, whatever that turns out to be in each case. That is a lonelier place than picking a team, but it is also the only place your work has integrity. You are not disloyal to both. You are loyal to something harder: doing right by people. Still, integrity at work does not have to mean loneliness in life. Find people, outside the role, who know you as a person and not a confidant or a function. Let yourself be the one who confides for a change. You carry everyone else's trust all day. It is right that you have somewhere to set your own down.