Why does my teenager seem addicted to their phone and how do I help?

Addiction language is useful because the design is intentional—notifications, streaks, algorithms that learn what keeps them scrolling. It's not weakness; it's engineering. But I'd look beneath the phone. Teens use devices the way we all do: to manage big feelings, to feel less alone, to have some control in a world that doesn't ask their permission. The phone isn't the problem; it's the solution they've found to something harder. Removing it without addressing that is like taking away a crutch before the leg heals. Start with curiosity, not rules. What's on the phone? Who are they connecting with? What happens when they're *not* on it—boredom? Anxiety? FOMO that feels unbearable? Those are the real conversations. Then, *together*, you might explore what a different rhythm looks like. Not a ban—that usually backfires—but a conscious choice. And here's the hard part: it has to include your phone too. Not because you're guilty, but because they're watching whether you practice what you preach about presence mattering. The goal isn't zero screens. It's a life where screens serve their purpose and don't steal the room.