How do I know if I'm grieving my divorce or just going through the motions?

Grief after divorce isn't always obvious—sometimes it hides under numbness or restless anger. Mirabai knew that real devotion requires feeling everything: the longing, the loss, even the parts that don't make sense. When you're grieving, you're actually *present* to what was, what is, what won't be. Going through the motions feels hollow, like you're watching yourself from outside. Grief feels heavy and intimate, even when it hurts. So notice: Are you avoiding thoughts of your ex, or are you sitting with them? Do certain songs, places, or times of day crack something open in you? That crack is where grief lives, and it's honest. You might cry without warning. You might feel relief and devastation in the same hour. That's not weakness—that's your heart actually doing the work of letting go. The examined heart, as Mirabai taught, doesn't skip the hard parts. It moves *through* them. If you're numb, that's information too. It might mean you need permission to feel, or space to feel safely. Grief is the soul's way of honoring what mattered. Don't rush it. The motions will feel empty until you're ready to grieve.