How do I stop obsessing over someone who doesn't want me anymore?

Mirabai had to face this after her husband died — the grief was absolute, but she didn't cling to his memory to avoid feeling it. She felt it completely, and that's what freed her. When you can't stop obsessing, it's usually because you're not actually grieving. You're negotiating. You're replaying conversations, imagining how you could've been different, constructing elaborate fantasies about reconciliation. That's not love anymore — that's your mind trying to avoid the real pain underneath. The counterintuitive move: surrender to the loss. Let yourself feel how much it hurts. Cry. Write letters you'll never send. Rage if you need to. The obsession only has power because you're fighting it. When you stop fighting and start feeling, it loses its grip. Also: delete them from your phone. Unfollow. Make it harder to check on them. Your brain is addicted to hope right now, and you're feeding it. Finally, understand this: you're not obsessing because they're special. You're obsessing because you abandoned yourself in that relationship. Rebuild your life separately. Slowly, you'll stop needing the fantasy because you'll have a real life again.