How do I move forward when grief keeps pulling me backward?

There's an image in Mirabai's work: the soul reaching backward, always reaching, toward what's gone. It's not weakness. It's love trying to cross impossible distance. The backward pull is real and it's honest. And you can feel it while still stepping forward. Moving forward doesn't mean leaving grief behind like a room you've exited. It means changing your relationship to it. Some days it will be heavy, some days lighter. Some seasons you'll feel like you're starting over. That's not failure—that's how transformation actually works. It's not linear. Here's what helps: Notice the small moments when you're not thinking about the loss. Don't judge them. They're not betrayals—they're your psyche giving you room to breathe, to remember you're still alive and still capable of being engaged in the world. Those moments expand, slowly, if you don't feel guilty about them. At the same time, don't rush the backward reaching. Mirabai reached toward Krishna her whole life. The reaching *was* her practice. If you need to sit with old photos, reread their letters, tell their story—do it. Just notice when you're ready to also notice the sky, or someone else's kindness, or your own hunger. Forward movement isn't about erasing the past. It's about expanding your capacity to hold both: the depth of what was lost, and the stubborn, fragile fact that you're still here.