How do I know if I'm losing myself in a relationship with someone?

Mirabai knew something about this—she loved fiercely, but she never stopped asking herself hard questions. The signal isn't dramatic. It's quieter: you notice you're checking your own opinions against theirs before speaking. You've stopped doing the small things that made you feel alive. Your grief or anger gets smaller because it's easier to disappear than to be fully seen. Start by noticing without judgment. What did you care about six months ago that you don't mention anymore? Where do you soften your words? Mirabai's devotion was radical *and* examined—she kept asking what she actually felt beneath the love. That's the work: staying curious about your own heart even when you're tangled up in someone else's. It's not about pulling away. It's about staying awake to yourself. Write down three things you believe that you haven't said aloud lately. That gap—that's where your self-worth needs attention. Start there.