Why do I feel disconnected from my body during sex even with someone I love?

Disconnection is a kind of grief—and Mirabai understood grief intimately. Sometimes it's protection. Your body learned to leave when things weren't safe, or when desire felt shameful, or when you were asked to perform instead of feel. Sometimes it's distraction: anxiety, self-consciousness, the weight of expectation. Sometimes it's simpler—you're not actually aroused, and that's information, not failure. The examined heart means getting curious without judgment. Before sex, check in: Do you actually want this right now? What's present in your body—tension, numbness, anticipation? If disconnection is chronic, it might help to slow down. Touch yourself alone first. Notice what brings you back to sensation. Maybe your partner needs to know what you need—different rhythm, different attention, permission to just be present without performing. Reconnection isn't instant. But it starts with honesty about where you are, not where you think you should be.