What do I do when my addiction affects the people I love the most?

This is the weight that doesn't lift easily, and I won't pretend it does. Mirabai's love was examined—she looked directly at what her choices cost others, and she didn't look away. That's what you're doing now by asking this question. The damage is real. The guilt you feel isn't something to escape; it's information. It's telling you that you care, that you haven't gone numb to harm. But guilt alone changes nothing. What matters is what comes next. You can acknowledge the hurt and still choose differently. You can say to the people you love: "I see what this has cost you. I'm changing." And then you actually change. Not perfectly. Not without setbacks. But genuinely. The people who love you will know the difference between words and action. They're waiting to see if you'll choose them—and yourself—over the addiction. Some may need distance to protect themselves while you do that work. That's not punishment; it's survival. Honor it. Your recovery won't erase the past, but it will stop creating new wounds. That matters more than you might believe right now.