Even neutral, factual feedback lands on me as an attack — I hear disapproval and disappointment in tones that carry none. My nervous system reads threat into a flat sentence, and I react to an aggression that was never there.

Question

Accepted Answer

The path forward: Notice the threat response Check the actual words said Respond to what was said, not feared One thing to try: After your next neutral note, write down what was literally said versus what you felt. Seeing the gap is how you stop reacting to a tone that was not there.

Even neutral, factual feedback lands on me as an attack — I hear disapproval and disappointment in tones that carry none. My nervous system reads threat into a flat sentence, and I react to an aggression that was never there.

Working through this?