The short answer
Stop running fake consultations. If the decision is yours to make, own it out loud. Tell your team what you need from them — input, context, a sanity check — and be clear that the final call is still yours. Honesty about the process costs far less than pretending you don't have one.
Your team isn't upset that you made the call. They're upset that you pretended you weren't going to. People on teams are good at reading the room — they can tell when a conversation is real and when it's theater. Research on team trust points to one thing consistently: trust breaks not when leaders decide, but when leaders are unclear or dishonest about how they decide. The pretend consultation didn't protect anyone. It just made you look like you had something to hide.
Marcus Aurelius put it plainly: if it isn't true, don't say it. That's the whole issue here. You said 'we're deciding together' when you meant 'I've decided and I'm telling you.' Those are two different things, and your team deserved to hear the honest one. The Meditations push toward one standard — do what fits, say what's true, and don't dress either one up to avoid discomfort.
This week, call it by its real name going forward. Before your next decision, say out loud to your team: 'I'm going to make this call, but I want your input on X before I do.' That's it. Name what kind of input you actually want — a flag if they see a risk you've missed, a read on how the team will receive it, something specific. That's not weakness; that's clarity. And clarity, right now, is exactly what rebuilds what the pretense cost you.