My manager sat me down to talk about "the next level," the things that would help me grow, and all I heard was a list of ways I'm not good enough. She meant it as an invitation. It landed as a verdict. By the end I wasn't leaning in to improve, I was just quietly shrinking from the whole conversation.
More people experience this than they realize.
You hear "here's how to grow" as "you're failing," so help feels like judgment.
If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.