I can write a cold message that a stranger will actually answer. I know how to find the little hook, the flattering detail, the fake urgency that makes someone feel they should reply. Lately I catch myself doing it in real conversations too, and I don't love what that says about me.
More people experience this than they realize.
You've gotten so good at manufacturing reasons for people to reply that it unsettles you.
If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.