My partner and I are both trans and we're realizing we have completely different relationships to visibility - they want to be stealth in most contexts and I feel like I'm disappearing parts of myself to accommodate that, but we also share a life where these decisions affect both of us. We haven't figured out how to honor both of our needs without one of us feeling like we're compromising our safety or authenticity.
More people experience this than they realize.
Two people are discovering that their individual safety and authenticity needs around trans identity create competing pressures in their shared life.
“Where Are You with The examined queer identity?”
If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.