LibraryScenariosWhen couples can't agree on marriage after years together
Scenario

When couples can't agree on marriage after years together

My partner and I are both in our forties and have been together for six years, but lately we keep having the same circular argument about marriage — they want it and I'm not sure I ever will, and we can't seem to find any middle ground that doesn't leave one of us feeling like we're compromising who we are.

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More people experience this than they realize.

What we've seen

Two people have discovered a fundamental incompatibility that threatens not just their future together, but their understanding of what love requires.

Ideas that help explain it
Worth thinking about

“Where Are You with African Ubuntu Love and Kinship?”

If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.