LibraryScenariosWhen your child alters their appearance for the deceased
Scenario

When your child alters their appearance for the deceased

I found my ten-year-old cutting her own hair because she said she wants to look different so her dad would recognize her in heaven.

Mira
Online
The coach is replying

More people experience this than they realize.

What we've seen

A child's physical transformation reflects deep confusion about death and identity, as they reshape themselves to maintain connection across the divide.

Ideas that help explain it
Worth thinking about

“Where Are You with Children and grief — supporting young people?”

If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.