Periagoge
Scenario

When couples try to change habits together but keep triggering each other

My wife and I both decided to quit drinking three months ago and we're doing okay individually but we keep sabotaging each other in subtle ways — like she'll suggest we go to places where we used to drink together, or I'll bring home fancy sparkling water that reminds us both of cocktails. We can't figure out how to support each other's sobriety without constantly referencing what we're giving up.

More people experience this than they realize.

What we've seen

Two people attempting parallel behavior change discover their intertwined patterns of reinforcement create unexpected obstacles to individual progress.

Your guide for this
Patan
Patan works with people navigating exactly this kind of situation.
Ideas that help explain it
Worth thinking about

“Where Are You with Habit formation and behavior change?”

Peri

Peri can explain why this happens, help you decide if this is the right situation for you, and point toward the right journey or coach.

If this sounds familiar, the Library can help you find the bigger picture.