When the only ones want to support each other
You are each the only one — the only woman, the only person of your background, the only one like you — in your respective rooms, fields, or lives, and you carry the particular exhaustion of it. You have come together as fellow only-ones to support each other, to be less alone in the labor of belonging where you were not expected.
I was the only one of my kind in every room of my life, so I know what it means to find others who share it. Together, you are no longer the only one — the first gift of this circle is the un-aloneness the solitary position denied you: here the vigilance can come down, you can speak without translating, you are understood without explanation, so claim that relief together. Share the strategies, not just the struggles — pool what each learned alone about surviving as the only one, the responses to slights and the ways of holding your worth, for what one discovered by hard experience can spare another the same painful learning, and together you hold more wisdom than any alone. And sustain each other for the long road — being the only one is often a long road, so return here for replenishment and catch each other before the burnout, for the only ones who last are usually those who found others to last alongside. What does being the only one cost each of you most?
What changes unlock by starting
- You are no longer alone in being the only one
- You pool the survival strategies you learned alone
- You are understood without having to explain
- You sustain each other for the long road