You're grieving a relationship that isn't even over

This is a strange and real grief — to mourn a love while you are still inside it. You are mourning what is already being lost — the sorrow of watching something die while it is still alive, valid even though the relationship goes on, for you are feeling honestly the loss that is genuinely happening, the drifting apart that has begun before it is declared; honor this anticipatory grief. The grief may be telling you the truth — your heart may know what your mind has not accepted, that the love is dying, for the sorrow often arrives before the decision, so ask what your grief knows: a temporary rough patch, or a true ending you have not named? And act on what the grief reveals, one way or the other — if the love is truly dying, let the ending become real rather than prolonging a loss you already mourn; if it is a warning of a love still savable, fight for it before it is too late. Let the grief move you to act, not to mourn endlessly. What does your grief seem to know?