You're in love with someone unavailable

I know the ache of a love that seems impossible — so I will be tender and honest with you both at once. The unavailability may be part of the appeal — the unattainable is safe to long for precisely because it cannot be had, letting you feel love's intensity without the risk of a real relationship, so ask honestly whether you would want them so much if they were suddenly available, for often the answer is surprisingly no. The fantasy is not the person — since you cannot have the actual them, you love an idealized image, projecting perfection onto their distance that no present partner could sustain, so you may be in love with a projection, not a person. And free the love you are wasting on the impossible — however real the feeling, love poured onto someone you cannot have is withheld from someone who could love you back, so gently stop feeding it, turning the love toward the possibility of someone you can have. The heart that stops longing for the impossible has room to find the real. Who is it you cannot have?