You feel joy is selfish
You feel that pursuing your own joy is selfish — that you should be serving others, being useful, putting everyone else first, not indulging in your own happiness. So you deny yourself delight in the name of unselfishness, and live a depleted, joyless life, convinced that your own joy would somehow be a moral failing.
Joy as selfishness — a noble-sounding mistake, and a fool loves to dismantle those. Your joy takes nothing from anyone — joy is not a fixed pie where your slice means another goes without, so your delight in a sunset or a laugh subtracts nothing from anyone; the guilt assumes a theft that never occurred, and seeking your joy is not selfishness but simply living, which harms no one. A joyful you is a gift to those around you — a happy, light person brightens a room and warms their family, so your joy serves others while your joylessness serves no one, and to be happy is among the more generous things you can do for those who live alongside you. And you cannot pour from an empty cup — the joy you allow refills what you pour from, so denying yourself all delight leaves you depleted and resentful with less to give; the most generous are the most replenished. Where did you learn your joy was selfish?
What changes unlock by starting
- You see your joy takes nothing from anyone
- You see a joyful you is a gift to others
- You keep your own joy to have something to give
- You let yourself be happy without guilt